Theater review

One hour and 30 minutes with no intermission. At the Hudson Theatre, 141 West 44th Street. Through Feb. 16.

The phrase “all in” probably summons flop-sweat memories of putting every one of your chips on the poker table.

Well, at the Broadway show “All In: Comedy About Love,” the audience does the very same with their hard-earned money — and loses big-time.

Ticket-buyers are being charged as much as $800 a pop some weeks for what is little more than a sedate staged reading of New Yorker cartoon captions uttered by celebrities.

Over the next 2 ½ frigid months, some 14 stars — including Jimmy Fallon, Lin-Manuel Miranda, Annaleigh Ashford and Hank Azaria — will lounge in armchairs clutching binders for dear life.

But the first group, which opened Sunday at the Hudson Theatre, is John Mulaney, Renée Elise Goldsberry, Richard Kind and Fred Armisen.

That talented quartet plays a roster of obnoxiously wacky roles from humorist Simon Rich’s short stories: sensitive pirates, child film noir detectives, “Elephant Man” Joseph Merrick and a nearly dead talent agent who tries to sign the Grim Reaper.

Mulaney, the best stand-up comic around, kicks things off with an overlong “guy walks into a bar” joke centered around a “ten-inch pianist.” I needn’t elaborate. And then the crew quickly recites “dog missed connections” in which canines attempt to reconnect after a run-in at the park.