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Reading Hans Christian Andersen’s The Princess and the Pea as a child was a formative experience. I’ve had issues falling (and staying) asleep ever since I can remember, so I finally felt understood. I am not a bad sleeper; I’m just “the princess and the pea.” As an adult, I’ve learned that means I am very particular about my bedding (pillows, sheets, mattresses, duvets, etc.).

So I set out to find the perfect pillow. In a span of two months, I tried about ten different types of pillows. My criteria for finding the right one? It needs to be soft enough that I sink my head into it, but not so soft that my head feels like it is on the mattress. I generally prefer down pillows, but I am also open to a down-alternative option. And when I ordered them, I didn’t distinguish between the two, giving both options a fair shot. Below, you can find what I liked (and didn’t like) about each one I tried.

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Our top picks

The Kassatex European Down pillow was my overall top choice. I returned to this pillow night after night, not wanting to try the others because I liked it so much. It is pricey, but what is that saying about spending half of your life in bed, so you might as well invest in it? Yeah. The squish factor is perfect: My head sinks into the pillow, but not so much that it doesn’t offer support. I ordered the medium support level, but it is also available in soft and firm support levels.