Founded in 2010, Vivino is an app where wine lovers can catalog and rate their favorite — and not-so-favorite — bottles. In its decade and a half of existence, the online hub has accumulated millions of wine reviews, with users sharing their own personal opinions on just about every bottle available on the market.

While many of the reviews are useful for shoppers browsing store shelves or restaurant lists, others can get a bit… unhinged. Some users treat the platform as a chance to share personal stories, while others use it to test out their poetry chops. Some even use Vivino to share pleas for expensive bottles of wine, like one user who left a 5-star review of Domaine de La Romanée-Conti Romanée-Conti Grand Cru, a wine that typically goes for $23,999 a bottle, according to the app, with the note: “I haven’t tried it but if someone wants to send me a bottle please message me 🙂 thxs.”

Anyone who downloads Vivino is bound to find loads of helpful, and sometimes hilarious, content, so we scoured the internet to find some of the app’s wilder moments. Read on to discover eight of the funniest wine reviews on Vivino.

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“Like drinking sparkling lava. Had it with lobster and it was like the lobster didn’t exist.. Loved the wine… Sorry, lobster”