My [25M] ex girlfriend [25F] has been back in touch and it’s making me have doubts about new girlfriend [22F] and what I want.
Oct. 08, 2019
TLDR; my ex girlfriend left me back at the start of April. And now I’m seeing someone else and she’s contacted/tried to contact once or twice. I don’t know what to do.
Here’s the whole situation. My ex cut me out of her life after she got pregnant and decided she didn’t want to keep the baby (claims she forgot to take her pill). She said she had a lot of things to work out and said that her head had been foggy for a while and that she hadn’t felt herself.
She was the first girl I’ve properly loved. I’m a mess for 3 whole months, crying nearly every day. Drinking every weekend to numb the pain. The whole cliche dumpee. Right about at the end of the 3 months I was in contact with her, we had seen each other on a night out and was talking again. She called me one night and we had some banter and were getting on. Shortly after that, nothing for a number of week. To be honest I wasn’t pursuing her any more or stalking her and felt like I was getting over her. Honestly I started to resent her a bit because she just gave up on what we had.
Fast forward a few more weeks and I’m going out every weekend still, drinking and picking up random girls just for the fun. One night I meet an incredible girl who I am now in a relationship with. We get on really well, have similar views and are into similar things, great sex. Couldn’t be better really.
Anyway, about 1 or 2 weeks in with my new girl I get a text from my ex. (Idk if she had heard I was seeing someone new , it’s possible as we have a lot of mutual friends) She tells me she is finally feeling herself again and that she doesn’t blame me for anything that happened and that she’s sorry for how she acted. I told her she didn’t have to worry and that I was glad she was back to herself. She tried to engage in some small talk and ask how a party I’d been to was, to which I completely ghosted out of respect to my new girl.
Fast forward about a month I wake up to a missed called from the ex at gone midnight on a Thursday night. Left it the morning but couldn’t help texting on the night to ask if everything was okay. She replied “yeah sorry, was a little drunk”
This was about a week and half ago and I’ve thought about her every day. It’s really fucking with my head. There are clearly some lingering feelings for my ex on my behalf. I genuinely wanted to spend the rest of my life with this girl. We had know each other since school. I really do love my new girlfriend but I don’t know, is this just a red light that I’m not fully ready to commit with her.
Please help me out with any advice please! I don’t want to hurt anyone :(